let's make this third time the charm, eh? On the contrary, your choice to stay with him at this point in time reflects your love for him and commitment to your marriage.
I've tried to be understanding to his situation. He has to come to his own decisions about that.
She has said or done nothing wrong to him. He comes from a family history of domestic violence. Should I be ashamed for staying with him?
I wish you all the best for a peaceful outcome Mike, and for your family to truly heal from the pain of family discord and divorce.
You could also work on ways you can incorporate some type of group component or other viable alternative into your treatment so you can get the best of what that offers too. This helps to be able to work towards any personal healing that may be needed and on changing those behaviors.
Honestly, I am exhausted dealing with this same situation and nothing changes. This may take years though. I am looking for batterers' specific treatment and am not court ordered. A tree fell one street over and took out a power line or two. It sounds like he needs his space and if you try to force something on him that he can't or won't do right now will likely only backfire for you.
They prayed with me and continually are doing so. I also think you should be able to share your feelings honestly with him about how hurt you are and try to build on that in a positive way. If an occasional lunch or movie works and is acceptable to you both, then that's okay. When he's ready he will come around. let me get back to you on that, TiVo.
Such healing often takes place over a considerable amount of time, even years, and the level of progress really depends on the person, level of abuse and the circumstances involved. I feel this is disrespectful to my fiance. One of the primary ways we heal from such situations involves caring and supportive relationships with others. You may remain anonymous if you like, and patience is required because there's been quite an overwhelming response here and there are many questions waiting in the wings!
I believe God can heal my marriage and that I am not in any harm. Online counseling is also more affordable than traditional therapies and may be an option to consider.
That's a great step because covering up such severe problems only serves to keep them in the dark and continues to give them power.
These are very common feelings for abuse victims, and in order to get past them they have to be acknowledged and dealt with.
I believe God can heal my marriage and that I am not in any harm.
If he isn't willing to make such necessary changes you both would be wise to seriously reconsider the marriage issue.
He also is not going to get that help as long as he doesn't see the need for it and is in denial about his problem. Just remember, this is a public forum and all questions are subject to screening and approval.