Am I a pawn in your game, that you devotees should
play me, now thisway, now the other?
Daminis heart, thinks he,does not yet respond to
the call of the ethereal heights. I was feeling done todeath with mystic
emotion.
Let me arrange foryour stay meanwhile with your
aunt, as usual.
Nor could I make up mymind to desert Satish. Well,
the books I ordered were unmitigatedly modern. Instead ofpandering to worldly needs
they are dedicated to the service ofdevotees.
I also embraced alland sundry, wept without
provocation, and tended the feet of theMaster. One day I could not help suggesting:
Lets offer someto Satish as well. This was the house where we now went into
residence.
The severest test came in her intercourse with the
Master.
First of all, said Damini,she is not myown aunt at
all.
What made it more difficult stillwas that he
harboured a secret fear of his ward.
That is why, when Satish came up, I had to feel
ashamed.
Satish, trembling from head to foot with a nameless
fear, fled fromthe room.
Devotees kept streaming in from all quarters to sit
at the feet of theMaster. After hisdiscourse had progressed awhile, something in our
faces gave himpause.
That is why, when Satish came up, I had to feel
ashamed. There was a mongrel pup, whose looks were on a par with its breeding. The
factis, rebellion had been long brewing within me. The day was fast declining, and
the moon was long pastits full.
We could catch momentary glimpses ofher through
opening doors and flapping curtains.
Without, the curves of youthenveloped her in their
fulness, within flashed fitful fires. She fights shyof Satish because for him her
feelings are of the oppositedescription.
Well, the books I ordered were unmitigatedly
modern. Satishpassed and repassed, longing to join in, but could not,
unasked.
The poormortals whose ears happened to be within
reach were woefully agonised.
I crawled back to my blanket and stretched myself
on it again.
Her demands on me had suddenly ceasedaltogether.
Nabins wife has taken poison, I think, she said.
The Master could notgive up either of us without a
struggle.
All four of us sat down to rest on the sandy soil
beneath thecocoa-nut groves fringing the sea. MeanwhileNabins wife lit upon the
discovery that her husband had seduced hersister. At the edge of the shadow,under
its thick foliage, sat Damini lost in silent thought. This occupation, viewed as
anexcuse, was simply hopeless. He tucked the books away under thebolster on which he
reclined. The Master hadaddressed himself to some specially important topic. One day
I could not help suggesting: Lets offer someto Satish as well.